Somehow, blackface wasn’t even the worst of it
There are weeks (months, years) when you *gesture broadly at everything* *make glib comments about challenges being great for building character* *laugh/grimace while cosplaying as the shruggie emoji*
This is fine is what repeats in your head as you watch in real time as your industry sets lives on fire. It is the armor that gets you through the day despite the news, despite the push notifications, despite the update in the family group chat, despite the phone call.
Ok but what now demands the chorus, what now and what next.
You tell people you love them, even and especially the ones who’d be surprised to hear that from you, to hear from you.
You practice resilience, even telling people the truth about the hard thing when you would really prefer anything but vulnerability.
You repeat the cheesy affirmation in the mirror in the morning and again at night and sometimes you even believe it.
You put your devices on DND but still answer all the work messages.
You make fresh pasta from scratch with the pasta maker you bought on a whim at that thrift store and Marcella Hazan’s tomato sauce and then you wonder if the people who made the video still have their jobs.
You spend the weekend wondering how you can extinguish some of those fires, and how long it will be before your own burnout. You know the real answer to that question.
You think about the now and the next and what fine would really look like.
Write it down. Take a breath. Maybe add more salt? Yes, that could work.
Now, about that affirmation.